Too often we (women) define ourselves by our ability to answer to the needs of people and things we love. I write about how we work, heal, nurture and give over and over, day after day to ensure their success and happiness.
And I also write about our struggles! I write about overcoming the challenges we face when it comes to building our own dreams. For some reason, creating that thing that WE have been dreaming about for ourselves can seem almost impossible! Somehow we think we don’t have the time or skills to make it happen. And we bury ourselves so deeply in doubt and fear that our dreams are no longer clearly visible.
Why is this? Why do we struggle to create and do that thing that we’ve been dreaming about when we do such a great job at supporting other people as they create and build theirs?
Here is why and say this with me…
“Not putting myself first often enough is at the root of why I struggle!”
If we could manage to give ourselves a fraction of the time, love and energy we give to the most important person/thing in our lives, we could get there!
This doesn’t mean that there aren’t other important things to do like having the proper tools and know-how but it is definitely the most important first step!
Now, being able to do this won’t happen instantly, it’s a process. At first, it will feel strange and wrong and selfish and that’s ok. Believe me you’ll get over this!
Here’s how to start…
- Embrace the fact that…you deserve this!
- Know that even though it may not seem like it, the people that love you want you to do this! If you don’t believe me, ask them!
- Know that the hardest resource to give to yourself will be TIME. You’ll always feel like something or someone else is more worthy of it. This is undeserved guilt; move past it.
- And finally and most important, discard the notion that giving yourself more means that you must give others less. Whether you’re giving it to yourself or something else, there will always be enough love to go around. That’s how love works. And isn’t more love the thing that we’re actually denying ourselves?!
So, as we brace ourselves for the coming of the New Year, begin to give yourself the love you need to get over the struggle you’re experiencing. That love may come in the form of more time, more rest, that class you wanted to take, that doctor’s visit you need to make, the business you want to start, the energy to practice better habits, etc.
No matter what it is, remember you are worthy of it!
Forward this message to someone who needs to love themselves a little more!
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